Editor’s Note: This post appeared on The Daily Love.

“One of the main weaknesses of mankind is the average person’s familiarity with the word ‘impossible.’ He knows all the rules that will not work. He knows all the things that cannot be done.”
~ NAPOLEON HILL

I was in NYC with my mom this past weekend and had a short conversation with a woman while we were on the bus. She was about 55 years old, used a cane, and was at least 75 pounds overweight. As a result of being hit by a drunk driver several years ago, she told us, “she was limited physically.” I listened to her story and understood her challenges. However, a different story flashed in my mind of Anthony Robles, who won the 2011 NCAA Wrestling Championships in the 125-pound weight division. He also was limited physically because he was born with one leg but still managed to become a champion athlete and one of the most accomplished wrestlers in Arizona State history. Two people with limiting factors in their life, yet two very different outcomes.

We all have a story. Many of us believe our story defines us, but what really defines us is how we interpret the story or facts and choose to move forward.

According to the National Science Foundation, our brains produce as many as 50,000 thoughts per day. Ninety-five percent of these thoughts are repeated daily.

Your thoughts become your beliefs, which, in turn, become your mindset. Your mindset governs your actions, which lead to your results. In short, if you have a mindset that limits your potential, then you will likely accept limited results in your life.

Be honest, do you have a mindset that limits what’s possible in your life or one that encourages you to see potential and possibility and move past obstacles? Are you more familiar with the words can’t, unattainable and impossible or do you naturally see solutions and challenge the status quo?

One of the most effective ways to change your mindset is to be honest with yourself and consider the following question:

“What is your current mindset costing you?”

Are you staying in a corporate job you dislike because you have convinced yourself you are not qualified to do anything else or start your own business? This could be preventing you from feeling excited about your day, finding your passion and making a valuable contribution to the world.

Are you staying in an unfulfilling relationship because you have convinced yourself you can’t meet anyone else or don’t deserve better? This could be preventing you from meeting a loving life partner who respects you and wants to build a great life together.

Are you applying to college or graduate school programs but not challenging yourself to reach for the best school (for you) because you’ve convinced yourself you’re not smart enough to get into a better school? This could cost you job opportunities, earnings growth and a valuable network further down the road.

Sometimes it’s hard to quantify the costs of having a limiting mindset but they are real and show up in every facet of your life on a physical, emotional, mental, financial and spiritual level. Is your mindset costing you happiness, good health, time, love, money, laughter, opportunities or peace of mind?

Take a moment and move through the key areas of your life — Career, Relationships, Finances, Fun & Creativity and Healthy Living — to consider if your mindset is holding you back from reaching your greatest potential. This exercise is fun to do with a friend as well.

Remember, you decide how you think and what becomes a can or can’t. Start asking yourself what’s possible and what you really want to accomplish.

TOP 1% BOTTOM LINE: Our thoughts are powerful because they create the mindset that we live by. In moving forward, sometimes you need to take a moment to reflect if you have all the internal resources necessary to be your best – mindset is one of them. It’s time to be aware what your current mindset is costing you.

“People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking that they can do things. When they believe in themselves they have the first secret to success.”
~ NORMAN VINCENT PEALE

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Alissa is a Professional Life Coach, motivational speaker, and author of “Living in Your Top 1%: Nine Essential Rituals to Achieve Your Ultimate Life Goals” available on Amazon.com. She works with individuals and organizations to help them think bigger, redefine what’s possible, and get results. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. To learn more about coaching with Alissa and to take the Living in Your Top 1% quiz, please visit www.AlissaFinerman.com or www.facebook.com/alissafinermantop1.

“Everything should be made as simple as possible, but not simpler.”
~ ALBERT EINSTEIN

Sometimes life can be overwhelming with all the choices we have to make. So I like to keep things simple. And I find that keeping it simple is a great recipe for success.

I believe that deep down everyone wants to improve and lead his or her best life. Seems easy enough, but often challenging to implement because you need clarity and the courage to take action.

Here’s my recipe for success by keeping it SIMPLE…feel free to add on to make these rituals your OWN.

S: Define SUCCESS
We all want success but are you clear on what success means to you? To do so, it’s much more effective to focus on YOUR top 1% rather than on THE top 1%. Living your best life is dependent on doing what brings you energy, makes you feel alive and connected, and leaves you feeling fulfilled. It’s not dependent on your status, role, $$’s, or education as society likes to have us believe.

A client recently shared the following…

“I recommend if you have a dream follow it as soon as you can! I stepped into the French Culinary Institute this morning for my class after having 4 hours of sleep due to work and it didn’t matter, my heart was racing and I felt alive!!!”

Success is doing what makes you feel alive! Take the time to continually redefine what success means to you.

I: IMAGINE your ideal outcome
I like to encourage people to think in terms of the ideal outcome. This starts with your imagination. If you want to start a business, become a yoga teacher, or buy a house, train your mind to see all the possibilities by creating an inspiring vision for what you want. Then you can work backwards to see how your vision translates into reality. However, if you start dreaming and immediately let obstacles throw you off course, you create a less than ideal outcome.

The work is to have the courage to think without obstacles rather than let your mind be clouded by everything that can go wrong or the challenges that could show up. People who create think about what can be rather than why something can’t be done. You can train yourself to do the same.

M: Create a winning MINDSET
We all have a story. Many of us believe our story defines us, but what really defines us is how we interpret the story or facts and choose to move forward.

According to the National Science Foundation, our brains produce as many as 50,000 thoughts per day. Ninety-five percent of these thoughts are repeated daily.

Your thoughts become your beliefs, which, in turn, become your mindset. Your mindset governs your actions, which lead to your results. In short, if you have a mindset that limits your potential, then you will likely accept limited results in your life.

Start becoming aware of the words you use on a consistent basis and how often you tell yourself: can vs. can’t or impossible vs. possible.

Is your mindset costing you success or helping you excel?

P: PRIORITIZE What’s Important To You
Making something a priority is different than simply saying something is important.

I have lots of clients who think it’s important to make time for the gym or make themselves a priority but that doesn’t mean they do it. I start every coaching workshop by having people tell me their “wins.” Wins are anything that make you feel proud and give you the feeling of “I did it.” The consistent theme that emerges as to why the wins are accomplished is simple –people make them a priority. So if you want time to read to your kids, have a better relationship with your parents, go to sleep earlier, take a vacation, or take a photography class, make it a priority and you will see different results.

L: LAUGH often
I learned this one from my favorite yoga teacher, Jen Pastiloff. One of the things that I love about her class is her ability to make us laugh so we don’t take ourselves too seriously. We all know that tree pose or crow is serious stuff, but who really cares if you fall out of a pose? The truth — I do! But seriously, laughing opens up your heart and brings good energy into your life. Would you prefer to surround yourself with people who are laughing and fun to be around or Debbie downers? It’s your choice!

E: Bring EXCITEMENT into your life
Everyone can use a little excitement in his or her life and the easiest way to do this is to pursue a goal that is truly exciting rather than something you should do. How do you want to invest your time and energy? All the brilliant innovators get 24 hours in a day – the only difference is how you decide to use them.

You will naturally be more motivated and resilient when you fill your day with projects/a purpose/goals that are exciting to you.

TOP 1% BOTTOM LINE: Although life can be complicated, we always have the choice to keep it SIMPLE. To achieve this you need to know what’s most important to you and then focus on your top priorities. The process starts by gaining clarity on how you define success and then practicing your rituals consistently.

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About Alissa:
Alissa is a Professional Life Coach, motivational speaker, and author of “Living in Your Top 1%: Nine Essential Rituals to Achieve Your Ultimate Life Goals” available on Amazon.com. She works with individuals and organizations to help them think bigger, redefine what’s possible, and get results. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. To learn more about coaching with Alissa and to take the Living in Your Top 1% quiz, please visit www.AlissaFinerman.com or www.facebook.com/alissafinermantop1.

The goal of the “Living in Your Top 1%” interview series is to break down the qualities of people who excel and to show that you can be successful and achieve personal greatness from any starting point in your life. The interview series looks at people from all different careers and industries. Some names will be familiar and others may not. The purpose is to understand and borrow from the “best practices” of winners to develop a roadmap to YOUR TOP 1%. We will share a new story each month.

This week’s guest is Violet Zaki, regarded as a master fitness instructor. She started her journey in Australia as an overweight teenager. She decided to take charge of her life when she was 15 and set out on her fitness adventure. Violet is an adidas Global Fitness Ambassador in Martial Arts and travels around the world introducing her programs and inspiring people all over the world.

I first met Violet in NYC while taking one of her classes at Equinox. She has amazing energy and inspires hundreds of people every week in her packed classes. She believes we all have one mind, one body, and ultimately one life to live. It’s how we choose to use these tools that makes the difference in our journey through life. We are responsible for the choices we make and how we influence others. Take charge of your life…dare to live an extraordinary ONE.

Alissa Finerman: What’s the most important strength you possess that allows you to be successful in your role?
Violet Zaki: Clarity, perspective, and being persistent in the face of challenges.

I have very specific goals so I have a clear idea of what success looks like
and how my goals fit into the big picture. This helps me evaluate my progress and course correct as part of the journey. Another part of the process is to be persistent and have the guts to face failure and to learn from any mistakes. Ultimately, these strengths help me instill the right beliefs and patterns of behavior to make changes.

AF: What does success mean for you?
VZ: For me, success is a product of my self-expression and creativity and is a reflection of my drive, motivation, and discipline. I always look for opportunities to step into my greater self and to find joy and inspiration.

AF: What role does mindset play in reaching one’s potential?
VZ: Mindset is key and there are several areas to consider which include:

* Self Awareness: reflects my core strengths, talents and abilities
* Focused determination: enhances my stubbornness by not taking “no” for an answer
* Curiosity: makes me take more risks
* Intuition: tells me to listen to my gut instincts when I’m not in an emotional state
* Accountability: makes me show up every single time to keep my commitment
* Integrity: keeps me honest, dependable, and responsible
* Emotional/Mental fuel: gives me the mental/emotional strength I need when I want to give up
* Willingness: opens my heart and mind to do whatever it takes to learn
* Assertiveness: reminds me never to act like a man in a skirt to achieve success
* Ability to pivot: keeps me on my toes so I know when to give up, stop what I’m doing and head in another direction.

AF: What motivates you on a daily basis to keep going?
VZ: Failure

AF: What role do goals play in your life? Tell us a few words about your goal setting process.
VZ: Goals give me a sense of productivity. Being an avid user of lists and someone who likes to stay highly organized, I create a vision board. I start by creating a list of what my big picture will look like and how I will be once I have achieved this goal and then I continue to chunk it down with my “to do” list and target dates. I review this monthly with a “status report” to evaluate my progress.

For example: GOAL: Become a Body language expert
“To do” List:
• Explore Classes
• Sign up for classes by Oct 2011
• Buy books on the topic
• Attend classes

AF: What challenges have you overcome on your path?
VZ: The biggest obstacle really was two-headed, one external and the other internal. In 1993, determined to challenge myself, prove my independence and evolve out of cultural/familial limitations, I set out on my own and moved to the U.S. (New York) as a first generation Egyptian Australian female at the age of 25, tethered only by an impromptu commitment to volunteer at a non-profit children’s summer camp run by the Association for the Help of Retarded Children (AHRC). Unsure what to expect, I hoped to establish a foundation in human services, backed only by my undergrad degree and a couple years experience in the field of disabilities in Melbourne, Australia. My ultimate aspiration, though, was to build a top-flight career in the fitness industry.

A seemingly insurmountable external hurdle surfaced in my effort to secure a green card, requiring eight years of simultaneous work at two jobs—career development counselor at my sponsor AHRC and volunteer fitness instructor at the YMCA—including a four-year setback when my day-job manager failed to file the appropriate paperwork before deadline. I certainly questioned my resolve during this period, especially for a brief time when I had little money to eat more than bagels at each meal after paying rent. But I stayed focused, set ascending goals, and made the most of the process, including obtaining my black belt at the YMCA (after being physically attacked in a NYC subway). This gave me a sense of safety and belonging while being a single Aussie female whose family was thousands of miles away.

Yet, like many people I have worked with on a daily basis for the past seven years as a full-time fitness instructor, particularly women, the toughest challenge was probably the internal one of building self confidence and self esteem – really believing I had what it took to excel at my passion and rise to take advantage of each greater opportunity that came my way. Even today, after many gratifying years rallying others to self empowerment, along with unimaginable achievements as a fitness personality, I still have to give myself a pep talk every now and then.

AF: What are some of your most meaningful accomplishments?
VZ: I am most proud of going from being a self-perceived underdog (I was underdeveloped as a child, viewing myself as the “runt of the litter,” and then somewhat overweight as a teenager) to becoming a support system for those who face similar personal struggles.

The ability to dig deep and become a successful, self-made professional female, especially when remembering the personal reinvention necessary at times along the way, is very much part of this gratification. I relate back to this and the feeling gets reinforced every time a student of mine shares the emotional, mental, and physical strengthening they are undergoing as a result of my teachings, authentic engagement with them, and efforts to create a positive environment allowing them to grow while still challenging them to get out of their comfort zone.

AF: What do the top performers do differently to excel?
VZ: People who excel: set goals, constantly re-evaluate, correct and change course, maintain flexibility, are kind to themselves, and have a mentor.

To learn more about Violet, please visit:
www.ZakiFitness.com

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About Alissa
The “Living in Your Top 1%” interview series is presented by Alissa Finerman, a Professional Life Coach, motivational speaker, and author of the book, “Living in Your Top 1%: Nine Essential Rituals to Achieve Your Ultimate Life Goals” which is available on Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble. She has an MBA from the Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. To learn more please visit, AlissaFinerman.com and Facebook.com/AlissaFinermantop1.com.