Success – Page 5 – Alissa Finerman

Strategies For Success In The New Year, Part 1

December 27, 2011 By Alissa Finerman 3 Comments

Editor’s note: Six Strategies for Success can also be found on Positively Positive.

“What is not started today is never finished tomorrow.” ~ Goethe

The beginning of each year is when we have the most energy, hope, and desire to create a successful new year. Although it can be overwhelming, this is exactly the time you want to be thinking, crafting, and gaining clarity so you can put your ideas into high gear in the New Year.

I believe that everyone wants to improve and live his or her best life. The questions are what do you want and how do you get it??

I encourage my clients to spend less time on New Year’s resolutions that they probably won’t keep and more time on the truly important stuff. Here’s what I want to know:

* What’s important to you?
* Why is it important?
* What are you committed to making a priority in your life?

Yes, simple yet complicated.

As you think about the above questions, consider these 4 strategies to help you have your best year yet. I will share more strategies this week.

1. DROP THE SHOULDS: I don’t care about what you should do, or rather what society and other people think you should do. I want to know what YOU want to do. That’s what you need to go after.

2. START WITH THE IDEAL VISION: Train your mind to start with the ideal outcome and vision for what you want. Even if something seems like a long shot, there’s no need to compromise before you even start. Remember, all the great masters started as beginners. So whether you want to change careers, start a new business, or buy your first home — you CAN do it!

3. GET A GOAL: Happy people set goals! Plain and simple. We all need something to look forward to and work toward. And do me a favor, set a goal that truly excites you and adds meaning to your life rather than setting the same goal you’ve had for the past ten years (but not completed such as lose 10 pounds)…learn something new and move outside your comfort zone. There’s no substitute for that feeling of, “I did it.” Yes, your goals need to be specific, measurable, actionable, and have a time target but the real movement starts when you go after something that is both important to you and a priority in your life. To read more about goals, check out my blogs on GOALS.

4. BUILD A TOP 1% TEAM & SURROUND YOURSELF WITH WINNERS: Surround yourself with people who believe in you and want to see you do well. And, it’s important to spend time with people who inspire you and help you think expansively! Your Top 1% Team needs to energize and fuel you rather than drain your energy. Your team can include people, ideas, books, quotes, classes, conferences and more. Basically, anything that inspires you and helps you improve!

Top 1% Bottom Line: Ideas combined with actions are a compelling combo that will make you feel good. Now is the time to put into practice your most powerful and meaningful rituals for a fantastic new year. I believe in you. Now show yourself what you can do! Feel free to share your best strategies for success in the comments section.

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About Alissa

Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher, Brookfield Property Partners, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb and Dress for Success. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook

Define Success to Create Success

October 13, 2011 By Alissa Finerman Leave a Comment

Editors Note: This post originally appeared on Tiny Buddha

“What matters is the value we’ve created in our lives, the people we’ve made happy, and how much we’ve grown as people.” ~Daisaku Ikeda

Ahhh success! It sounds so good. We all want it, but are you brave enough to define what success means to you and go for it?

Society conditions us to define success as being the best, attaining prosperity, making a lot money, or having a fancy CEO title.

I thought I had “success” ten years ago where I spent five years working on Wall Street at Credit Suisse, an investment banking firm in New York City. I started as an associate on the Corporate Bond Sales desk and was promoted to a Vice President.

I worked at the firm as a summer intern between my first and second years of business school and received a full-time offer. I remember being very hesitant about taking the job because I knew it wasn’t my passion, but I didn’t know what else I wanted to do.

It was exciting when I first stepped on the trading desk—tons of energy, noise, and people sitting less than three feet away from me on both sides. In an unexpected way, the noise faded into the background and I became used to it.

I enjoyed the job at first and how fast paced it was, but after a few years, I realized that I was not engaged on this path. I believed that there was something more for me.

It was confusing because I had a good salary, good title, and a good life, but it wasn’t fulfilling. Many thought I was “successful” by the traditional definition, but I did not feel like I was on my true path and making a difference.

I stayed in finance for a while hoping my feelings about the role would change—they didn’t! Although I’m interested in the markets, I’m not passionate about them. I wanted to read personal development books in my free time, rather than Barron’s and Business Week.

The truth was finance, although a great path for some, wasn’t my path. This took me a while to admit. It’s powerful to face the truth! The job was draining my energy, and after a few years, I wasn’t excited to start my day.

Often the hardest thing to do is to walk away from something that is good for others but not great for you.

When I was 40 years old, I made a tough decision to change my life and leave the finance world for real. I opted for a much more fulfilling life as a Business/Life Coach, Speaker, and Author. I had to take a step into the unknown and create another career and life that felt authentic.

I love what I do now because I get to read and write about things that inspire me and help others make a difference in their life. I feel like I am making a positive contribution to the world and that makes me happy!

I only share that I was 40 because people often convince themselves that it’s too late to make a change after a certain age. It got to the point where I couldn’t stand one more day in a job that drained my energy and soul rather than inspired and refueled me.

Yes, I had some financial security in the short term, but I still needed to reinvent my life. The most important factor was that I had confidence in myself.

I believe age is just a number. Dara Torres, at the age of 41, earned a spot on the United States Olympic Swim Team and won three silver medals at the 2008 Beijing Olympics. She proved her words that “the water doesn’t know your age…[goals] may be hard to achieve, but your dreams can’t stop because you’ve hit a certain age.”

She swam her fastest race ever in the 50-meter freestyle and set a new American record. As a result, she redefined what’s possible and changed the way we look at age.

Options are available to all of us. It’s just a matter of being honest, gaining clarity, and taking action.

Be daring—tell me what success means to you? Is it being the CEO, starting your own company, being financial independent, volunteering and helping others, having good friends, carving out time for your favorite hobby such as photography, being in shape, loving yourself, or spending time reading to your children?

I’ve met a lot of people who’ve achieved “success” but feel unfulfilled and unclear on what they believe it means to succeed.

True success is based on our personal set of beliefs, our values, and the choices we make throughout our lives. As our values and ideas shift, our definitions of success will change, as well.

Success is dynamic.

Our work is to make sure our current definition of success is aligned with the goals we pursue and the choices we make. Only some of us will take this step, but it’s available to all.

One person may define success as being married, working for a good company, and having savings in the bank, and someone else by being healthy, making a difference, or making yourself a priority. It’s is a personal decision.

For me, success is about making a positive contribution to the world and sharing my best self.

It’s not about the $ signs. Opportunities emerged when I realized success is internal rather than about externals.

Three thoughts to help explore success:
1. Clarify what success means to you.

Go ahead—be brave, bold, and most importantly be honest with yourself. Let’s be clear, only you define what is and isn’t possible—not someone else. If we were at a dinner party and everyone had to share how they define success, what would you say?

2. Pursue goals that are both important and priorities in your life.

In his book, Open, one of the world’s greatest tennis players, Andre Agassi, talks about the first time he earned the No. 1 ranking in the world. He said that he felt empty and unfulfilled. It wasn’t until Agassi won the French Open and put his tennis earnings toward building charter schools for underprivileged children and helping others that he felt a deeper sense of fulfillment (and he met his wife Stefanie Graf).

The takeaway is that being No. 1 may equate to external success but it does not necessarily equate to fulfillment. Do your goals add meaning to your life?

3. Believe that you can achieve success (or top 1% moments) from any starting place in life.

I left a successful finance career late in life and started a new career when I was 40. I completely turned my world around and moved from New York City to Santa Monica, California and had to build both a business and a new community of friends. It’s never too late to make a positive decision and turn your ideas into action.

In the words of Nelson Mandela, “It always seems impossible until it is done.” What would you love to achieve in your life?

When you are ready to accept nothing less than walking on your true path to success, you will have a renewed sense of empowerment, and you will start to see new opportunities.

TOP 1% BOTTOM LINE: Success is not defined by what society or others think is right for you but by what makes you feel whole and adds meaning to your life. It’s never a comparison. Only you know what makes you smile and leaves you with a greater sense of fulfillment.

There are many definitions for success. It’s time to find yours.

***

About Alissa

5 Ways to Feel Empowered Each Day

June 30, 2011 By Alissa Finerman 1 Comment

* This post originally appeared on The Change Blog

“If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves.” – Thomas A Edison

The question we need to explore is not what we know but what we embrace and practice in our life on a daily basis. Most of my clients and people I talk with know what they are supposed to do but doing it is always the issue. Given that we are mid-way through the year, it’s the perfect reflection point to take note of what’s working in your life and what small changes you can implement that will make a positive impact. The consistent small actions add up and often lead to amazing results by year-end.

Here are five powerful yet simple ways to make a meaningful difference in your life on a daily basis:

1. Be The CEO of You Inc.

You Inc. represents all the different areas of your life including Career, Relationships, Finances, Healthy Living, Fun & Creativity, and Personal Growth. You need to invest in and be mindful of each of the areas to present your best self on a daily basis. The key theme to realize is that life is a series of choices and you are in the drivers seat (not someone else). You Inc. is the most important business you will run because it’s your life and you need to take an active role in all the decisions. It’s time for you to decide what commitments get added to your plate and when to say “NO” vs “YES.”

2. Assess Your Words

Yes, we’ve all heard that being “positive” is important and makes a difference — so why aren’t we doing it all the time? I continue to see people limiting their potential because they embrace negative words and beliefs. Our mindset defines what we believe is possible and impossible. So if we continue to reinforce that starting a new business, running a 10k race, or finding a job is impossible then that’s the song that runs through our mind. I encourage all of my clients to delete the words, “can’t” and “impossible” from their vocabulary and use words that inspire, empower, and motivate you such as I can, I will, and I believe in myself.

3. Remove The Should Factor

I should spend more time with my family, I should volunteer at my children’s school, I should attend that social event….the “shoulds” go on and on. But what we really need to focus on is what we want to do and be rather than what we think we should be doing? The most precious resources we have are time and energy so if you are consumed with thinking and doing all the “shoulds” in your life, there’s little time to focus on the parts of your life that are most fulfilling. You can implement this small shift by starting to notice when and if you use the word “should” and if it positively or negatively impacts your life.

4. Redefine Success

Often our definition of success changes over the years but often we do not adjust our mindset, goals, and actions for the life we want to live today. After business school, I defined success in terms of title and money but soon realized that success for me was about being fulfilled, making a difference, and loving what I do. How do you define success in your life and are you taking steps to create the life you want?

5. Set a Goal That Matters

This seems like an obvious one but so many people either do not set goals, set vague goals, do not take action on their goals, or set goals that are important but not a priority. The amazing part about goals is when you set a goal that genuinely excites you and is a top priority in your life, you are focused and motivated on a daily basis. It adds that spark to your life and gives you a purpose when you start your day.

The process of setting goals is about feeling a sense of mastery and building confidence each step of the way. To start, focus on goals that are meaningful, genuinely exciting, and ones that you are willing to make a priority today. Goals are personal so choose one that speaks to you and then write it down. Remember it’s a process so be patient and ready for some bumps on the road!

Top 1% Bottom Line: Living your best life is a mindset, choice, and way of life. Once we decide that being our best is not optional but rather how we live, a world of opportunities open up and challenges are re-framed. We see the world through the lens of what if and why not and train our mind to focus on solutions rather than problems. The choice is yours!

About Alissa

Playing the Game Like a Professional

May 9, 2011 By Alissa Finerman Leave a Comment

This article was originally posted on Virgin.com

Words are easy. Action requires commitment.

There are many amateurs talking about all the things they want to do or should do. They use sexy phrases such as positive thinking, redefining their potential, and the law of attraction. But these phrases become meaningless if you do not back up your thoughts and words with action.

All of these ideas can be very powerful if you put them into practice like a professional. Otherwise, it’s similar to having a gorgeous new pair of shoes but never taking them out of the box – what good are they?

Professionals understand how to close the gap between saying what you are going to do and making it happen. And most importantly, professionals understand that phrases like “living in your top 1%” or “raising your game” are about making progress rather than being perfect.

THREE RITUALS TO BEING A PROFESSIONAL:

1. EMBRACE A CAN-DO MINDSET

A mindset is a set of beliefs that defines who you are and what you can do. This set of beliefs defines what is possible or impossible.

According to the National Science Foundation, our brains can produce as many as 50,000 thoughts per day. Ninety-five percent of these thoughts are repeated daily. So you decide what becomes a can or can’t. The following chain reaction illustrates the effect that your thoughts can have on your life:

Thoughts -> Beliefs -> Belief System -> Mindset -> Actions -> Results

Assess the words you use on a daily basis and determine if they align with the results you want as the CEO of your life, then put your words into action.

2. MASTER OBSTACLES

Professionals realize that obstacles and progress go together. Whichever road you choose to live in your top 1%, it is important to know that obstacles will show up. All people and great companies have encountered challenges on their path to creating something special.

For example, Thomas Edison tried over two thousand experiments before he invented the light bulb. Tony Hsieh, CEO of Zappos, was told he couldn’t build a company based on customer service and online shoe sales. He did just that with Zappos and sold the company to Amazon for $1.2 billion in 2009.

Professionals use three categories to classify their obstacles:

• Speed Bumps: These are obstacles that slow you down, but ultimately you can get around them and stay on track with a clear and focused mind (e.g. being stuck in traffic or losing your phone).
• Detours: These obstacles often force you to be crafty and devise a Plan B or alternate solution. You still arrive at your destination, but it will take commitment and extra effort to prevail (e.g. a restaurant not having your dinner reservation on a packed night or not getting hired by the firm of your choice).
• Roadblocks: These obstacles can derail you unless you are focused, determined, and committed to your goal and making progress (e.g. losing a loved one or getting fired).

As you create your roadmap, consider what road sign best describes how you want to view obstacles. If you hit an unexpected detour you will not want to see a sign that says ‘Dead End’. A better sign would be ‘Plan B straight ahead’.

Visualize what your sign looks like and what the words say to keep you on the right path. Remember, you define how you view your obstacles, they do not define you.

3. LIVE IN YOUR STRETCH ZONE

Each day is an opportunity to redefine what is possible if you put your words into action. When you move outside your comfort zone you have the potential to produce extraordinary results that you may not have experienced otherwise.

Recently, I worked with a 45-year-old female client who sold financial products and was at a crossroads and fearful to move outside her comfort zone. A headhunter contacted her for a management position at another top tier finance firm and she declined at first because she was fearful to risk what she had (a good job, good clients, and financial stability) to pursue something new.

We discussed the pros and cons of the new opportunity as well as her goals and values. She decided to interview for the job and three weeks later was ready to move outside her comfort zone and into a management position. She is now one of the most senior women on Wall Street.

There are three zones of actions:

• Comfort Zone: The comfort zone holds your existing habits.
• Stretch Zone: The stretch zone is about learning and growth.
• Stress/Danger Zone: The stress/danger zone leaves you feeling overwhelmed too much of the time.

The ideal zone to function in is your stretch zone. This is the zone where you are taking on new challenges, adapting, and building confidence. The challenge is to maintain living in your stretch zone without tipping over into the stress/danger zone. This happens as you become more aware and practice being in that uncomfortable place. Professionals move outside their comfort zone repeatedly to embrace action and their results prove it. It’s never easy but neither is being a professional.

Check out a short video on moving outside your comfort zone.

TOP 1% BOTTOM LINE:

Both professionals and amateurs make choices everyday as to how they will live their life. The amateurs ‘try’ to do things and the professionals get it done. The amateurs say it’s ‘impossible’ while the professionals show what is possible. The amateurs have great ideas and the professionals take their great ideas and put them into action.

The differences are sometimes small but the results are huge. Professionals enjoy success by putting their ideas into action and pursuing goals that are meaningful.

About Alissa

Success: 3 Rituals to Raise Your Game

April 15, 2011 By Alissa Finerman Leave a Comment

Note: I originally wrote this post for Virgin.com

Everybody wants it but what are you really willing to do for it?

I’m talking about success of course. Many of us have a glorified meaning of success that society and the media have formulated for us since our younger years. The dictionary defines success as the attainment of wealth, position, honors, or an achievement. I’d like to see this definition revised so that it’s separated from wealth and status and connected with quality of life, fulfillment, happiness, and achievements that are personally satisfying and enhance your life.

I can point to many people, including myself, who achieved a fancy title and had a high-paying job but ultimately were searching for a different meaning in the word success. For some, success is a title, dollars in the bank and prestigious job, but for others it’s spending quality time with your children, mentoring employees at work, volunteering, starting your first company, learning a new skill such as playing the piano, or completing your first triathlon.

You have to decide what success means to you. As you continue on your journey to be a successful entrepreneur, businessperson, artist, writer, or parent take a few minutes and think about how you would define success on your path – not what society thinks you should do. One effective approach is to practice rituals that will help you raise your game.

Three rituals to achieve greater success in your life:

1. Step into the role of CEO of YOU INC.

YOU INC. is the most important business you will ever run. It includes every area of your life (i.e. work, health, finances, and relationships) and needs your time and energy to thrive.
* Only repeat rituals than enhance YOU INC. and add value to your day.
* Make yourself a priority and focus on your greatest asset – you.

2. Practice the 3 C’s: Choice, Commitment and Consistency

Formula to drive your actions: Choice + Commitment + Consistency = Your Results
* Choice: Everyday is a new opportunity to make choices that add value to your life.
* Commitment separates those who try from those who succeed.
* Consistency keeps you in business and allows you to raise your game.

3. Get a Goal

Goals help you achieve a sense of mastery and enjoy greater fulfillment and happiness in your life. Consider the P-E-M approach as you pursue your goals:
P = Pursue goals that are a tier one PRIORITY. Lots of things in our lives are important (health, work, and relationships) but when something is a priority it gets added to the schedule. Tier one goals are your top priorities and need to get done first. For some, it’s paying your rent, going to the doctor, taking a vacation and for others it’s losing seven pounds before your high school reunion or launching a new product line.
E = If your goal doesn’t EXCITE you when you start, I can assure you it won’t excite you when the going gets tough – and there will be bumps on the road. Figure out what is it about the goal that would be exciting for you to achieve – that’s when you’ll find yourself motivated to keep moving forward. For example, it’s not super exciting to tell yourself you won’t eat sugar or bread for three weeks but it is exciting to say you will fit into your jeans from college or have amazing energy every day.
M = Goals that add MEANING to your life keep you focused and hopeful about what can be. When you take an action because the goal aligns with your values, you are on the right track. If you want to start a company, do it because it’s a life goal and you value flexibility rather than something you want to prove to your family or co-workers.

Top 1% Bottom Line
Success is about reaching your personal best without comparing yourself to others. It’s about being inspired and inspiring others on a daily basis to raise your game. You will need to use your strengths and talents to move past roadblocks and put your ideas into action. I call this “living in your top 1%” and the quest starts by asking, “What does my top 1% look like?” You can begin by training yourself to practice the rituals that bring you success.

About Alissa

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