Does your story EMPOWER you or DIS-EMPOWER you? – Tony Robbins
We all have a story. Sometimes it explains why we can’t do something and other times our story propels us forward. I’ve heard cases where people have the same story such as lack of money, resources, or knowledge and one person eventually starts a successful business while the other is out of work and depressed. One story with completely opposite outcomes.
When you tell your story, you MUST…
Be honest about your story and stick to the facts.
Nothing more nor less!
Create the story that empowers you forward.
Never lower your standards!
Live your truth.
We all have stories in different areas of our life. The facts are always available. The only thing that changes is how we interpret them and how much we embellish them.
Facts: You have kids, time is in limited supply, you want to spend time with your kids
Your Story: You can’t get in shape because you have kids and don’t have time.
Truth: You must prioritize exercising because you want to stay healthy and be around to enjoy your children for many years.
Facts: Your career is unfulfilling, you would like to be happy in your job
Your Story: You can’t leave your job which is unfulfilling because you will never find another job and you have no other skills.
Truth: You need to move outside your comfort zone to learn new skills and find a job that makes your happy and allows you to share your strengths.
Facts: You grew up in a dysfunctional home
Your Story: You can’t have a good relationship because you grew up in a dysfunctional home.
Truth: Surrounding yourself with stable people and creating a positive environment are very important elements because you did not have either when you were growing up.
Often, clients have different stories for different areas of their lives. For example, one amazing and successful client has a can-do mindset in business and athletics. In his career, he believes he can close any deal and handle the most difficult clients. In the area of healthy living/athletics, he has the courage to go after his goals and compete in various triathlon competitions with no limit. However, in his relationships, he has the story that he’s had really bad luck and therefore, he’s not cut out for intimate relationships. Although relationships are challenging for all of us, I challenge his story line.
The one thing I know for sure, as Oprah likes to say, is that sticking to the facts leads to a more powerful story. If you have had relationships or jobs that weren’t fulfilling, then say that. Your story is not permanent. Focus on what you want to bring into your life and why it’s important. Create the story that empowers you forward.
TOP 1% BOTTOM LINE: Often you have to challenge your conclusions and ask yourself if they are true. Does it really make sense that you can make anything in your career and fitness happen, yet relationships elude you? How much time do you spend on the areas you are successful in versus the ones you would like to have different results in? Your story must be the truth. This is the only way to create a top 1% path.
Alissa Finerman is an Executive Coach and Gallup Certified Strengths Coach, speaker and author of Living in YOUR Top 1%. She works with managers, C-suite executives and teams to leverage strengths, shift beliefs and achieve meaningful goals. Alissa has an MBA from the Wharton School and a BA from the University of California, Berkeley. She has worked with Ross Stores, Petco, BNP Paribas, Gibson, Dunn & Crutcher, Brookfield Property Partners, Neutrogena, Bristol-Myers Squibb and Dress for Success. To learn more about coaching with Alissa, please visit her website and follow her on Facebook